Gregory Tarnoff Photography & Design
Madison | Milwaukee

Archive for the ‘Prose’ Category

New year, new post, new things to get done. GSDASTFA

January 4th, 2010, posted in Prose

Welcome to 2010.

So according to the movies I grew up watching, we are supposed to have interplanetary travel, contact with alien life, flying cars, and personal robots. Well it hasn’t come around at this point, but some goods things have, for me at least.
I just completed my first year trying to live a vegan life. It hasn’t been one hundred percent successful, I did have a few days where I consumed dairy products, but overall things are going well. I lost nearly 35 pounds just by eating vegan. I find myself more compassionate towards others, calmer, and thoughtful. I also completed my third year without a cigarette. This is awesome.
With 2010 here, I thought it might be a good idea to jot down some things I’d like to accomplish. These aren’t resolutions, but focal points of my time. So without further ado….
  1. Write more. The plan right now is to write one article every two weeks. Starting with this one. Some will be on tech/web issues. Others will be philosophical musings, Buddhist or vegan oriented. (Although I will post any recipes I come up with on my other site http://www.veganseat.info)
  2. Up my creative game. This one is a little tougher, but also a little broader. I want to produce one piece of creative content (not tied to a job) per week. This could be HTML/CSS, Javascript, a Wordpress theme, a full site, or a poster/wallpaper. The point is to push my personal envelope creatively and develop my skills.
  3. 365 self portrait. This is pretty straight forward: take a self portrait every day. See my progress on flickr – http://www.flickr.com/photos/urothane/sets/72157622992286695/
  4. Bike more. Do yoga more. I am trying to do one or both each day, along with meditating. I want to get fit, have more energy and maybe try to bike a century ride this year.
  5. Get more tattoos. If you happen to have a tattoo studio and need some web work, lets talk trade.

Whhiiiiirrrrr, Click, Click, Whhiiiiirrrrr…Heartbreak

September 19th, 2008, posted in Computers, Prose

The Death of an iPod

Just over eighteen months ago I purchased my second iPod, this one with video. It was to replace my ailing iPod Mini that only held a 5 hour charge, had a faulty click wheel and had trouble syncing. The Mini lasted 30 months before reaching this state. Shortly after buying my iPod with video, I started noticing skipping in the middle of my songs. Sometimes it would skip places in the song, but more often it would jump to another song. The tracks played fine in iTunes so I returned to the Apple Store and the Geniuses there look at it. Apple promptly replaced it and claimed it was a hard drive about to fail that was causing the issues. I continued to have periodic issues with the new iPod but mostly on tracks that had skipped previous to the replacement.

Don't Wash Your Bluetooth Headset With Your Laundry

July 29th, 2008, posted in Computers, Enlightenment, Prose, iPhone

Sunday my phone needed a charge. When this happens I plug my iPhone into the computer and put on my headset so I can walk around my house and still talk. The headset was bugging me that day so I put it in my shirt pocket. I proceeded to eat lunch and naturally spilled on my shirt. Since Sunday is a laundry day in my house, I dropped the shirt into the washing machine with the next load.

Quotes and the Four Noble Truths (well at least three anyways)

April 9th, 2008, posted in Buddhism, Enlightenment, Prose, Quotes

The purpose of a fish trap is to catch fish, and when the fish are caught, the trap is forgotten. The purpose of a rabbit snare is to catch rabbits. When the rabbits are caught, the snare is forgotten. The purpose of words is to convey ideas. When the ideas are grasped, the words are forgotten. Where can I find a man who has forgotten words? He is the one I would like to talk to. -Chuang Tzu

Last night I spent nearly an hour meditating with the group up at the Milwaukee Shambala Center. Every Tuesday they offer meditation lessons or a group sit followed by tea and a lesson and discussion on Buddhism. This week they covered the third of the Four Noble Truths: Cessation of Suffering. The key to focus on as presented last night is the suffering we generate within ourselves once our basic needs are met.

The first truth is the recognition that suffering exist or the nature of suffering. Like all problems you can not solve them without acknowledging it. The second is the origin of suffering. Our desire to be right or to crave things leads to suffering. Cessation of suffering comes when we begin to let go of the desire to be right or crave. By releasing the thought, we can prevent the speech. Preventing the speech can prevent the action. Without the action there will be no suffering. In many cases there are more than one way to accomplish a task or goal. Instead of sticking to your guns and ideas on how it should be done, be open to all possibilities. You will feel less frustrated reducing your internal suffering. By being open and accepting of others ideas you will also cause less suffering for them.

Happy Birthday Matthew and Oriole!

February 26th, 2008, posted in Enlightenment, Parenting, Philosophy, Prose

Today marks the beginning of a big week (well 8 days this year due to the leap year) for my family that just got bigger. Today is my brother’s birthday, next Tuesday is my father’s and mine is on the following Wednesday.

To make it even better, my brother had his third child (second son), Oriole Matthew, this morning at 1:02 AM. Yes, they share the same birthday.

When I was born my father said he gave all his future birthdays to me, and my brother has done likewise for his son. This makes me a bout to become the oldest male in my family. My dad was 32 when I was born and this year marks my 33rd birthday. Matthew is 29 today, so I want to know, as the new patriarch….can I retire?

Happy Super Fat Tuesday!!

February 6th, 2008, posted in Enlightenment, Prose

Well February 5th, 2008 is a big day. First we have Fat Tuesday and Mardi Gras. At work there was a party and I think people will do anything to get the company to pay for food. Second, it is Super Tuesday, the day when 24 states hold their presidential primary races. This is the day when the mainstream media told us we would know who the real candidates are. As I sit here writing this it seems that they are as befuddled with tonights results as they were with all the previous primaries and caucuses.

But bigger than all that is the weather. I know people all over the world say we are facing global warming. When I hear this, I ask them if they lived in Milwaukee, Wisconsin this year. As of yesterday we had broken our yearly average with about 53 inches total in snow. And when it hasn’t been snowing this year it is subzero, raining, sleeting or freezing rain. I haven’t seen the sun since November.

Of course tonight we are getting more snow…depending on where you are in southeast Wisconsin there could be up to 20 more inches in the next 12-16 hours! Long Beach, how I dream of thee……

This weather pattern isn’t starting out with just a pile of snow. It began with a quick cold snap this morning after several days of warmer weather. When I walked out the door , everywhere I turned I saw the most beautiful glistening lights … I mean ice. And not just a patch here or there. There was approximately 1/8 of an inch of the cleanest, clearest ice I have seen on all the sidewalks, driveways, parking lots and lawns. It really was quite beautiful after I got the image of Bambi trying to stand on an icy pond out of my head.

Now you are probably thinking, “OK a little ice. Take your time, step carefully and everything will be fine.” Remember that I said it was Fat Tuesday? I made vegetarian chili last week for a contest at work and brought it in a crock pot. Because the company social committee knew these two things, I was roped into making vegetarian gumbo for our Fat Tuesday celebration. 15 quarts of gumbo……

As I stepped outside I was carrying my crock pot, full of gumbo, and my messenger bag, with my iPod, laptop, and other essentials, AND two more Tupperware containers filled with gumbo! I have a notorius past of spilling food in crock pots as I drive, yet that wasn’t my fear today. I quietly mumbled, “Please, Please, Please, Please….” as I alternated shuffling my feet forward two inches at a time without them ever leaving the ground. It took five minutes of this wind up chattering teeth type movement to make it the 50 feet to my car.

Having reached a huge milestone towards getting to work with my 15 quarts of gumbo intact, I proceeded to carefully and strategically pack the three containers in front of the passenger seat in just such a way that none of them could fly about or spill. Feeling satisfied that those hours of playing Tetris finally paid off (I don’t recall many round or ellipse shapes in Tetris though), I began to clean the car off as it resembled a big red glazed Krispy Kreme donut. Gunning the engine to warm it up, turning on the defrosters and giving myself hand cramps while scraping had the car ready after another ten minutes (navigating around the car didn’t help much either).

Although I don’t own a fancy car with 4 wheel drive, traction control, or those other gadgets I do expect that when I hit the gas, I go. Well it worked in reverse, just not drive. As I pulled out of my parking spot, I pulled into a small dip in the road to accommodate the sewer opening, this was my greatest mistake of the morning. As I put the car in drive and pressed the gas pedal to finally get on the road to work, nothing happened. I pushed a little harder on the gas and heard the engine rev. Nothing happened. The engine shifted into second. Nothing happened. Third gear was next and the tachometer was reading 4500 RPMs. Nothing happened. The glaze had me, I was trapped in the gravity well of the sewer drain and not going anywhere.

This was great! I knew I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed when I was awoken by a migraine headache. Now I could push the car to the side until the ice melted and go back to sleep…..and then I saw the gumbo out of the corner of my eye. They were counting on me, so I began rocking the car, which isn’t easy in an automatic. I lost track of time, but eventually the wheels gained some traction and I slipped and slid all the way out of the apartment complex. And tomorrow I get to dig out again, so I better get a solid night’s sleep.